oh my god! my god this can’t be happening! god tell me, tell me this isn’t real! i can’t believe all that i have foreseen is finally happening. i cannot for a single second stand the way i feel. i always knew. i always saw it coming. enveloped now, encased by my worst fear. i’ve never felt the nausea of longing to feel nothing, i never wanted to cease to exist, just disappear. fear memories are all that lie ahead. never have i felt so lost. memories dull my senses. fear tragedy is all that lies ahead. never have i felt so dead. once felt so warm, no i’m fucking freezing. i am the once embraced abandoned one. i raised my eyes up to the light in hopes of finding healing; no relief was mine, i was burnt, by the sun

there’s a tear in my heart where the blood ran out. there’s a tear in my heart where the love ran out. i thought we worked, pushed toward the same ends, i’ll never be so quick to trust again. disenchanted, disgusted, i regret that i trusted. i put my faith. my faith in you, you poisoned me through and through. i though we both shared the same injuries. now i’ve found it’s you who injures me. my heart is cracked from being left out in the cold. i know you’ll pay for what you’ve taken – tenfold. disenchanted, disgusted, i regret that i trusted. i put my faith. my faith in them, they twisted the knife further in.

to the wounded: i have seen the self image that they’ve forced you to reduce to shattered glass, with the only remaining value lying in its jagged edges. but the few who warrant waking for await their recognition. no fear of death but with fear of life, your weakness fills everyone. so live. angels for everyone. for no lack of searching i can’t seem to find one. angels in everyone. what of all their promises? can’t seem to find much more than lies. angels in anyone. a permanent solution to a temporary problem. before i’d lay me down to rest, i’d throw away everything to live.